by A.J. Wood

Continuing Cell Phone Saga…

Continuing my rant from yesterday I had a student in class this morning answer their cell phone during my lecture. Normally they take the call outside or quickly turn off their ringer, but this lady chose to keep talking.

For those stubborn few I can generally stop the class (a tip I picked up from Ben) and they get the point and quickly end their conversation. This morning I was not so lucky and I had to take a slightly more aggressive approach.

“Excuse me, but if that call is important you’re welcome to take it outside.”

“Well this IS an important call – THANK YOU.” (the lady goes back into her phone conversation)

“Hey, don’t thank me. Thank everyone else who’s sitting here politely while you interrupt the class.”

I don’t think I’ll be making it on her favorite instructor list, but she did get off the phone.

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 by A.J. Wood

Ooh, I’m feelin’ feisty today…

I tend to think I’m an easy-going type of guy. Generally polite, I’m not one to make waves unless I feel particularly affected by something. Then there are the days where certain types of folks flip the little switch inside and BAM here comes the mischief.

If you are the type of person who would cross over two lanes of traffic to cut me off only to stop to throw out change in a TOLLTAG LANE then don’t be surprised if I run into you. Whoops! Did you just throw your change out onto the highway? Hey lady, I’m not the one stopping traffic in the middle of a TOLLTAG LANE and look there are ten cars behind me all honking at YOU. Might be a good idea to get off that cell phone and drive.

Amazing how some people are compelled to answer their cell phone when it rings. Doesn’t matter where they’re at, what’s going on, if it’s even appropriate, just “RING! Hey, Bob here. Wassup?” And why is it people will wear those earbuds while they walk around in public, but the same people don’t use the damn things while they drive? I walked into the restroom this morning and heard a guy in conversation. He’s in the first stall so I’m thinkin’ the second stall is being used.

<off topic>I hate public restrooms. I was once mugged at a urinal so I prefer a stall whenever possible.</off topic>

Before I can check the second stall the guy steps out and he’s wearing an earbud talking on his cellphone. Dude walks right passed me and out of the restroom. Any other day I probably would have let it go, but I quickly followed him out and tapped him on the shoulder.

“Look, not flushing the toilet after you took a dump I get that. That phone call is probably important and pinchin’ out a loaf without making so much as a grunt is quite an accomplishment. But seriously, not washing your hands afterwards? Dude, that’s gross.”

Now if I can just get in the habit of taking a cell phone pic when these things happen.

Link of the Moment: Neo Stream

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 by A.J. Wood

Campaign 2004

Once in a while I get the random e-mail from a Hotmail or Yahoo account that lambastes me for “my left wing views and support of all things liberal”. First off, I’ve never identified myself with either party and I’ve always welcomed open debate on whatever topic I happened to write about. I am fairly open-minded on a number of subjects, but a recent e-mail attempted to pin me down as to what exactly I stood for in this upcoming election year. Off the top of my head here’s what I think:

1. I believe in personal responsibility. While the chaos theory is in effect, YOU are ultimately responsible for the events surrounding your life. If you spill hot coffee on yourself it’s not the restaurant’s fault for making the coffee too hot, you’re just f#ckin’ clumsy. Sure Micky D’s has delicious cheeseburgers & fries & shakes & cookies, but damn man, put that shit down or you will get fat.

2. Family values come from family not the government. The thing I find most interesting about the Republican Party is while they tout a free market economy and less government control of businesses this doesn’t stop them from forcing their dogma on private citizens. If less government control is good for business then it sure as hell is good enough for consumers. It’s not the government’s responsibility to be the watchdog for family values, it is a family’s responsibility. If there’s a decline in family values it’s because families are less inclined to look at themselves first before passing the buck. You can’t control the media, the Internet, social peers, etc., but you can be a direct influence on your child’s life and their values.

3. Frivolous lawsuits bring damnation. As an amendment to Rob’s idea I say that the first offense to a frivolous lawsuit should be an immediately won countersuit, the second offense should be a public caning and finally if you just seem intent on being stupid the government simply deports you.

4. Of interest only to me. In a recent SprintPCS commercial a father complains that because his daughter’s nighttime phone minutes start at 9pm she prattles endlessly to the family (while braiding their hair). While it strikes a bit of funny seeing suburbanites decked out like Coolio I couldn’t help but wonder “What preteen needs a cell phone?” More importantly what kind of lifestyle do they lead? Maybe I’ve crossed that threshold into adulthood where I’m completely out of touch with the younger generation. I just recall simpler times as a kid. There were only four destinations as a kid – home, school, friend’s house and work (if you slipped passed that manager with a fake ID). It seems to me all these places still come with regular phones. And what about AIM? I’m thinkin’ Suzy/Sally/whatever would be chattin’ away online, typin’ in her blog, posting PhotoShopped love collages as a free technology alternative before gettin’ strapped with a cell phone.

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 by A.J. Wood

Looking from below…

A man was helping one of his cows give birth, when he noticed his 4-year-old son standing wide-eyed at the fence, soaking in the whole event.

The man thought, “Great…he’s 4 and I’m gonna have to start explaining the birds and bees. No need to jump the gun – I’ll just let him ask, and I’ll answer.”

After everything was over, the man walked over to his son and said, “Well son, do you have any questions?”

“Just one” gasped the still wide-eyed lad.

“How fast was that calf going when he hit that cow?”

====

A few years back I was hangin’ out with a buddy of mine and his two boys. In the process of rompin’ around one of the kids tripped on the carpet and face-planted right in the middle of the living room.

My buddy started laughing and before I could wipe the panicked look off my face his son looked up and started laughing too. “He’d be cryin’ like a baby if the wife was here. First rule of child-rearing – kids mimic adult behavior.” Apparently when the boys encountered something their kid brains couldn’t quite process they looked up at the parental units for the proper response.

It’s been a week since all the hoopla of the Superbowl and between the class action lawsuit and JT’s apology last night I got to thinking. How many kids would have noticed (or for that matter cared about) Janet’s boobie flash if a bunch of parents hadn’t flipped a nut?

Was it in bad taste? Sure. Wrong venue and timeslot? Okay. But did it shake the moral foundation of this country? Please…

Yes, I know I’m harping on a topic that by blogging standards is 2 years old, but as I’m in a government class this term, in the STATE OF TEXAS, where Bush is not only a hero, but will inherit his own highway with his initials on it one day… err… I digress.

Point is the conservative viewpoint is understood as THE viewpoint `round these parts. I get it. I certainly am not offended by it and don’t mind intelligent debates on whatever topic I happened to get speared with. I do have one request. I will gladly respect your right to look down on us from your morally superior high horse IF you treat the “deviant” as humanely as possible.

When touting the death penalty, I don’t revel in it by saying “Those f#ckers deserve to die, I’d pay to see it for myself.”

When voicing my opinion on abortion I would never say “Those bitches deserved to get knocked up so they better grow up and deal with it.”

Of course the best line from this week “All gays are going to hell anyway so why do I have to make their time on Earth any more enjoyable?”

I’m aglow with the kindness of God’s love that emanates from you my Christian brethren. There are plenty of things that I don’t like about this world and sure if I controlled the Etch-a-Sketch of Life maybe I would do something about it. But I don’t see the need to demoralize someone else or their views. A wiser man than me once said “Hate the sin, not the sinner.”

Jesus didn’t hang with just the righteous. Believe that.

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